Why You Don’t Want To Grow
Why You Don’t Want To Grow
Do you keep stopping yourself before major growth opportunities? Here’s why.
Photo by Doran Erickson
We’ve all had that opportunity presented to us to grow our business. Whether it’s a massive growth event, coach, course, or retreat, it has made us wonder… should I do this?
We ruminate on the idea pretty strongly and then right before our stronger instinct to jump in takes over, we balk. We balk and then we continue life as usual, in the same place we were before the excitement of possibility walked into our lives.
The self-stop isn’t usually because the offer wasn’t good enough, it’s because you’re not ready to grow yet. And when you’re not ready to grow, you have a deeper wound to address.
You Don’t Want To Leave The Unknown
I’ve known people who are extremely careful about the investments they make in their business and others on the opposite end who are aggressive about making investments.
Too much of one thing is obviously not a good rule to follow, but what can be admired about aggressive risk-takers is that they’re always further ahead than those who are too careful.
The magic in risk-takers is their willingness to leave the unknown and explore. This characteristic is what leads to potentially transformative experiences and introduces enough risk to open new doors.
Following this route comes with an acceptance that we individually don’t have all the answers and that in order to grow, we need to willingly open ourselves to the wildness of what’s out there.
There’s comfort in staying within the walls of what you know. When you understand how to run your business, you know what to expect. The known is not scary — that’s why it’s so easy to continue business as usual and not take that sidestep out of the norm.
As a repercussion though, you don’t pave any new paths and walk in circles until you eventually give in, or numb yourself to the boredom.
To Grow, You Must Sit With Pain
When there’s a deep chasm between you and the goal you’re going after, it’s nerve-wracking to jump — you don’t know if you’re going to fly or fall.
So instead of risking the latter, you stop, turn around and stay on your side.
The self-stop feels ok when the other option is to risk a fall and fail — failing feels like dying sometimes. Staying in the comfort of the daily routine is easy in this context, that’s why it’s so enticing.
Here’s the thing about growth though — it is by nature uncomfortable. Many of us complain and suffer when we’re going through a tough stretch, without realizing that the slough is how we know we’re growing.
If you truly want to grow, you have to be ready for the pain and be willing to sit in it. Those of us who are tired of the pain or don’t want to feel it balk at growth opportunities.
Growth and pain guide us on our journeys, hand-in-hand. You can’t have one without the other. So if you’ve been nervous or stagnant in your efforts to grow, look at your pain.
Is a past pain still holding tightly onto you?
Does the possibility of failure and coping through that pain immobilize you?
Answering these questions takes work and deep reflection.
Once you get to the source of this pain and where it comes from, ask yourself again — are you ready to grow yet?
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