How To Brag Without The Hangover
How To Brag Without The Hangover
When done right, bragging can actually help the people around you.
I struggled with my inability to brag for years. It felt gauche, pretentious, and unnecessary. I squirmed whenever I said something a little brag-y and would think about it for days after the fact. I frequently had bragging hangovers.
Bragging is an art form that’s easy to screw up, so it feels touchy to even attempt it. I let opportunities to brag slide over the years.
Not bragging felt comfortable, but I also saw how damaging it was to stay silent.
When I began to lean more into working with womxn entrepreneurs, I realized that not bragging hid me. It made me invisible to the womxn I wanted to create community with the most and contributed to womxn feeling alone with one fewer voice connecting with them.
I realized that I was contributing to a representation problem by holding back on the brags.
Bragging has some good features to it — it runs through the greatest hits section of someone’s life and helps the listener get up to speed on what someone has worked hard on recently. Bragging takes an unsavory turn when it becomes a monologue rather than a starting point for a dialogue, a means to belittle others, or a tactic to establish alpha within a relationship.
When we take the good features of bragging without all the bad, bragging feels like a courteous way to navigate conversation onto a specific map, rather than aimlessly wandering until nodes of connection are found.
I’d like to rebrand this type of bragging into “bridge-building” because that’s what bragging with positive intention feels like.
We need more bridge-building between each other.
What you’re doing right now through your business is inspiring someone. Doing well in your business is giving someone a case study on what’s possible for them. Just by existing and sharing your wins gives someone else permission to explore the same route of possibility for themselves.
If you have trouble with bragging like I used to, remember this — when done in the style of bridge-building, you actually help others feel less alone in their journey, and provide opportunities to spark more meaningful conversations.
Brag more the next time you have the chance, we all want that invitation to connect with you.
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